A day to recognize the thousands of women whose adoption choice give other women the opportunity to celebrate Mothers Day.

It is appropriate that the day before Mothers Day is recognized as a day to honor birthmothers. In a world where thousands of children are adopted each year, it is essential to take this opportunity to show respect for the women who first loved them. While stories of adoption steal the spotlight week after week, the birthmothers side is often left untold.

This is changing with the release of BECAUSE I LOVED YOU: A Birthmothers View Of Open Adoption (Goblin Fern Press, 2006). In the book, I share my journey in choosing adoption for my son Joe in 1985 and the growing relationship with his adoptive parents through his high school graduation. In order to dispel the myths regarding birthmother's it's important for people to hear the struggle women face when making this decision. For me, I began to imagine what life would be like if I kept my babyI was lonely, worried about money, working all the time. I imagined my child wandering into neighbors apartments looking for friends, someone to be a father. These thoughts always lead to screaming into my pillow out of frustration. After much consideration I knew that keeping him would be for ME, but placing him for adoption was best for HIM. I loved him enough to put his needs before mine. This is what birthmother's face, making a decision that will be hurtful to them in order to do what is best for their child.

During my quest for an answer, I met with other birthmothers and was surprised at what I heard from them. My family had been emphasizing to me that if I chose adoption, I would then be able to forget, put it behind me, get on with a normal life. While it seemed the women had indeed gone on with their lives, no one was forgetting a thing. I learned from those mothers that, yes, they did suffer loss, but what mattered most was that their babies would be happy.

I was lucky that a new wave of adoption had begun: open adoption. I had ongoing contact with my sons adoptive family and as the trust and respect grew, so did our commitment to each other and the boy we loved. Today, over 90% of domestic adoptions are open arrangements.

This building of a relationship was celebrated at my sons high school graduation. During the ceremony, the principal asked the parents responsible for getting their children through life to this day to stand. I sat and watched as Kathy and Jerry stood on either side of me. Then, simultaneously, they looked down to me and reached out their hands. Kathy said, "You belong here too," and holding my hands tight, they pulled me up to stand between them. My story mirrors that of thousands of other birthmothers, and on this special day, let us recognize their loss, their bravery, and their love.

Because I Loved You has been hailed by national adoption agencies as a roadmap to open adoption for all members and is available at many bookstores and online. A signed copy can be purchased at http://www.patriciadischler.com

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Patricia Dischler, Author, "Because I Loved You: Understanding A Birthmother's View of Adoption," http://www.patriciadischler.com

¶ 8:07 PM 0 comments

Step One

We admitted that we were bound by the illusion of ego-created pleasures and that our life was full of suffering.

Step one allows an individual to admit and recognize what is controlling his/her life. It is a chance for the person to become aware of the immense control that the ego has in their life and what this demanding control is causing in regards to the self-created suffering. This awareness is necessary in order to initiate the process of internal growth and recovery from the demands of the ego.

Step Two

Came to believe that the universal consciousness, that pervades the cosmos and resides within our being, could restore us to our true nature and eliminate suffering.

This step allows one to tap into that which has all power the universal consciousness. This source will allow for connection with the pure-self and the true nature of the universe. This restores the individual to pure-thought and right-action in order to get rid of self-created suffering and karma.

Step Three

Made a decision to detach from our insatiable ego and the illusory world and connect to the pure consciousness of the universe.

This step is about taking the initiative to begin searching for the true-self and detaching from the illusion of the ego. Once this decision has been made practice of meditation begins. This is a crucial step upon our journey because it gives us hope that there is something else besides the world of boundaries and limitations.

Step Four

Contemplated and expressed in written form our desires, fears, regrets, and attachments of the ego without judgment.

This is a vital step, which requires meditative and analytical thought about the nature of our worldly life without passing judgment on the past. We begin to realize that these actions were part of our illusion of what reality was and realize that now through meditation and growing awareness that we DO NOT have to act this way again.

Step Five

Allowed ourselves to become fully aware of our egoic attachments and delusions in an accepting manner.

This is when we look at all the past actions and currents attachments of step four and recognize the true reality of the illusion. We now are able to let go of the past and live in the present moment with full awareness.

Step Six

We were entirely ready to let go of the delusions of the mind and surrender to the omnipresent universal source.

This step is the letting go of the illusions of the past and creating a commitment to surrender and practice the principles of eastern wisdom. It is important to state our readiness for change and acknowledge it within our self, as well as the universe around us.

Step Seven

Contemplated and gained awareness of our shortcomings without judging or condemning ourselves, but allow total acceptance and forgiveness of these ego created quandaries.

This step is crucial for one to accept that they are not their ego or minds. We can overcome our shortcomings and come to know our true self, which, is the perfection of pure consciousness.

Step Eight

Began to nurture and practice compassion and forgiveness for ourselves and others who we harmed by our past actions.

This step focuses on relieving guilt and regret for the past and beginning now to realize that those actions do not define the self. Also discussed concerning this step would be the ability to eliminate suffering based on karma by right actions and right thoughts in the present moment where reality exists.

Step Nine

Directly apologized with compassion and sincerity to ourselves and to those we directly and indirectly harmed.

This is an action step that allows us to explicitly offer our amends to ourselves and those we may have harmed in our past. This step is a continuation of step eight and allows the guilt and regret to further diminish and eventually be released fully in order for us to immerse ourselves in the present moment.

Step Ten

Continued to seek awareness of our true self and practice right thought and right action in each moment of our lives.

This step focuses on becoming aware of ourselves on a daily basis and beginning to live our lives fully and sincerely in each moment based on the true nature of reality.

Step Eleven

Sought through the practice of mindfulness and meditation to improve our connection with the universal consciousness.

This step is meant to be practiced on a daily basis to improve awareness and detachment from the egos desires. This step will help one maintain recovery and stay focused on the illuminating truth of the universe.

Step Twelve

Having become one with the universal source we continued to practice these principles in each moment of our life, acting as models for those seeking the peace and tranquility of these steps.

Finally, this step discusses the continuation of these steps in our moment to moment existence and to share this way of life with others that inhabit this world. To share this wisdom with others is the primary goal of these 12 steps, which in turn benefits the individual as well as the universe as a whole.

My hope is that through the application of these steps at least one human being can discover the principle truth of the universe and escape the suffering of the egos demands and desires.

Copyright 2006-- Richard A Singer Jr.

About the author: Richard A. Singer Jr. is a practicing psychotherapist living in the Cayman Islands. He is formerly of Pennsylvania and has a Master's Degree in Clinical Psychology. His daily inspirations have been included as part of Chicken Soup for the Recovering Soul, from the bestselling Chicken Soup series. His own recovery from addiction impassioned him to help others find courage, determination and peace, and has made what some would call "work" the love and purpose of his life. To learn more about Mr. Singer, visit his Web site, http://www.yourdailywalk.org or E-Mail him at RAS9999@aol.com

¶ 1:43 PM 0 comments

Marriage proposals made over a romantic dinner at an elegant restaurant can be very romantic but they are not necessarily creative. Many women dream about the day that the man of their dreams proposes to them and hope that the day will be absolutely perfect in every way imaginable. In a recent study the majority of married women reported that they believe that their spouse spent a significant amount of money on their wedding proposal but that the lack of originality in the proposal had left the women feeling disappointed.

One creative way to propose for a couple involved in a long distance relationship is to plan a surprise visit and set up a scavenger hunt. You could have a friend pick you up from the airport so that your girlfriend doesnt know that you are coming to visit and have the friend give your girlfriend instructions for the scavenger hunt. You could hide a number of small surprises such as candy, flowers and a CD as the first few stops on the scavenger hunt and then hide at the final location poised to propose when your girlfriend completes the game.

An outdoor enthusiast might appreciate a creative proposal during a camping trip. Its a good idea to plan a quiet trip for just you and your girlfriend at a picturesque location. You could hide the ring in your sleeping bag to use in a surprise proposal. When its time to go to sleep after a long day of hiking and fishing, you could complain that there must be a rock or something underneath you and then pull out the ring and make your proposal. This creative proposal also contains the element of surprise as a camping trip is not a usual proposal location.

Another creative proposal idea is to place an ad in a local newspaper. You could place an outrageous ad in a newspaper asking anyone who was willing to get married to give you a call and include a fictitious phone number. Then when you and your girlfriend are reading the paper together, you could point out the ad as a joke and while she is reading the ad, seize the opportunity to pull out the engagement ring and let her know that you would love to marry her.

Proposing at a sporting event is a creative way to propose to a sports fan. For this proposal idea you could either arrange to have your proposal broadcast over the public address system or displayed on the large screen. If you are really adventurous, you could also contact the teams public relations department and try to make arrangements to make your proposal on the field at halftime. They might be willing to help you stage a scenario where you are either chosen to win a prize or participate in a contest and while you are on the field, they would hand over the microphone to allow you to make your proposal.

Another creative marriage proposal idea is to purchase a book of poems and leave the first few pages intact and carve a heart into the remaining pages and sew the engagement ring to the back of the book. You could suggest taking turns reading the poems on each page and plan to have your girlfriend turn the final complete page to reveal the heart and ring that were hidden inside. This proposal idea is not only creative but also incredibly romantic.

Having the DJ of your girlfriends favorite radio program ask her if she will marry you is another creative proposal idea. You will want to make sure that you are aware of the exact time that the DJ will be sending your message so that you are able to ensure that you and your girlfriend are listening together when he makes the announcement. You could also arrange to have the DJ play a song that has a special meaning for you as a couple so that you can enjoy a dance together after she accepts your creative proposal.

Another creative way to propose is to include all of your family and friends in the event by inviting them all to a surprise party for your girlfriend. To make this proposal work, you would either convince your girlfriend that you want to have a quiet dinner at home or at a restaurant with just the two of you. Once you arrive at the destination all of the guests will reveal themselves and while all eyes are on the two of you, you could take the opportunity to profess your love and propose.

Still another creative way to propose is to hide the ring in an unexpected location. For example you could pretend to have a clogged sink and while you are working to fix the clog, you could reach into the sink and pull out the engagement ring. When your girlfriend is nearby, you could seize the opportunity to pull out the ring you had hidden earlier and say something to the effect of, No wonder the sink is clogged, Ill have to find another place to store this ring, how about your finger? This whimsical proposal is both light-hearted and creative.

A variation on the traditional proposal at an elegant restaurant could be to have the waiter bring out the ring with the bill. You could have a little good natured fun with your girlfriend by going out of your way to drop hints that you would be proposing over dinner. If you keep up the act, she will be expecting your proposal with each course. After dessert you could tell her that you have something very important to ask and as she eagerly awaits your proposal, you could ask an inconsequential question about something completely irrelevant to your relationship. She will probably be furious at this point but her anger wont last as the waiter arrives with the bill and the engagement ring and you let her know how much she means to you.

Finally a creative proposal idea is for the woman to ask the man to marry her, instead of waiting for him to propose. Many women anxiously await the day that the man in their life will propose but why not add your own creative twist by proposing to him instead. The woman is free to propose in any way that she finds truly romantic and can ensure that the proposal is both creative and romantic and that its a moment that they both will remember for the rest of their lives.

A great marriage proposal doesnt have to be expensive or extravagant. Many women are more likely to cherish the memories of a proposal that was inexpensive but truly creative. The creativity is what makes the proposal so memorable and what makes it a great story to tell their friends.

Masni Rizal Mansor is the publisher for My Wedding Dresses. Get the best discount wedding dresses and cheap wedding invitation card

¶ 7:39 AM 0 comments

Looking for a natural way to get rid of your cellulite with exercise? Indeed, there are easy step-by-step plan which you can follow to slim down and have sexier legs, but only if you know the right exercises to get rid of cellulite

Most women know what it's like to have cellulite. It can ruin the day to look into the mirror and find those dreaded "crinkled-wrinkles" on areas of your legs, especially if they are visible when you wear shorts of bathing suit. While cellulite is not dangerous, it sure is not nice to look at... is it?

You probably wont have to worry about cellulite problem when youre younger. However, as you reach the 30's and couple with a busy life that lacks regular exercises, cellulite will start to show up slowly and surely.

Other than cellulite creams and lotions which may help temporarily, they really do not address the root of the problem. You need a proven exercise routine to eliminate cellulite permanently, especially on the legs. Such an exercise plan was even featured on local TV show; therefore it does really get rid of cellulite.

As cellulite can appear on various parts of the body, the following type of exercises help address the respective body areas.

1.Have a steady but long walk puts your body in a continuous rhythmic motion. This benefits not just the leg and thigh areas when it comes to getting rid of those cellulite but also most parts of the body from heads down; neck, shoulders, arms, back and the abdomen. However, how quickly and for how long you should walk, together with your body motions greatly determines if youll be just sweating it out or targeting at those cellulite.

2.Next, jogging at a comfortable but controlled pace will also benefit the whole body including our stamina. This exercise is especially target at cutting down cellulite on the legs. Again, special posture and motion is required to achieve the maximum result.

3.Swimming is probably one of the best exercises which tones most of our body muscles. Toning of muscles mean loosing of cellulite. Its also an exercise that does not strain any particular part of the body. Which swim style to practice is also an important factor when it comes to getting rid of cellulite.

4.Last but not least, calisthenics is probably the most targeted form of exercise for address cellulite issues. This is to put the body into a sustained period of repetitive rhythmic body motions, performed over a period of time consistently and regularly. It is by far the ultimate form of exercise to get rid of cellulite.

The above recommendations may sound like the usual options for a general health well-being. However, if done according to a systematic plan that contains years of research and application specially for conquering cellulite, the result will amaze many sufferers.

The sad truth about cellulite is that millions of women (and a few men) are plagued with this unsightly condition. Although there is no documented case where life was threatened by cellulite, it does affect the self-image and well-being of those who have it.

Renee is one of the first personal trainers in the U.S. having over 20 years of experience in exercise and nutrition training. She has worked in every aspect of fitness from classes to clients including development of corporate sectors ergonomic programs. Once a champion competitive bodybuilder and dancer, she now spends her time helping women (and men) make their body dreams come true with a unique and proven cellulite exercise program. More details can be found in http://www.cellulite.rid-of.com

¶ 1:39 AM 0 comments